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Educare i figli maschi: ecco gli errori da evitare

Educare i figli maschi

L’educazione dei figli è uno dei compiti più difficili per un genitore.
Corriamo sempre il rischio di essere troppo permissivi oppure eccessivamente severi. Non vogliamo viziarli eppure cerchiamo di dare loro tutto quello che chiedono, a volte senza domandarci se sia un bisogno reale o un desiderio passeggero. Dobbiamo capire quando è giusto assecondarli o premiarli, ma anche dire no ai capricci.
Abbiamo una grande responsabilità nei loro confronti: farli diventare adulti maturi e ragionevoli.

Non esistono istruzioni garantite su come educare un figlio. Possiamo ricevere indicazioni e suggerimenti da medici o familiari, ma la mia esperienza da mamma mi ha insegnato che ogni genitore deve trovare il proprio modo, in relazione al carattere e alla personalità del proprio figlio.
Ancora nell’educazione dei figli ci possono essere principi generali, ma anche delle differenze in relazione al sesso del bambino. Seppure per fortuna molti stereotipi di genere siano stati abbattuti, educare i figli maschi può comportare alcune difficoltà che nell’educazione di una femmina non ci sono e viceversa.
A questo riguardo può essere utile conoscere alcuni sbagli più comuni tra i genitori che hanno il compito di educare i figli maschi.

Educare i figli maschi: errori da evitare

    1. esaltare solo le “doti maschili” della loro personalità,
      è sbagliato elogiare esclusivamente quelle caratteristiche che nell’immaginario comune vengono identificate come doti di “mascolinità”, ad esempio la forza fisica.
    2. impedire loro di esprimere la propria emotività,
      anche i maschietti dovrebbero essere liberi di abbandonarsi al pianto o alla paura, se ne sentono il bisogno. Ammonirli dicendo che si tratta di atteggiamenti da femminuccia non solo li svilisce, ma fornisce loro una idea sbagliata delle donne.
    3. condizionare le loro scelte,
      molti genitori hanno per i figli ambizioni che loro stessi non sono riusciti a realizzare. È giusto spronare i figli a dare il meglio di sé, ma dobbiamo cercare di non condizionarli troppo.

educare i figli maschi

  1. allontanarli dalle attività considerate femminili,
    nell’educazione bambini maschi dovremmo cercare di insegnare che non esistono attività prettamente femminili, soprattutto per quanto riguarda i compiti da svolgere in casa. Ormai è risaputo che le coppie che collaborano sono le più durature. I maschietti dovrebbero crescere con la consapevolezza che partecipare alla gestione delle attività familiari è giusto e naturale.
  2. far credere loro di essere perfetti,
    è giusto trasmettere ai bambini considerazioni positive sui loro modi di essere, ma lodarli anche senza motivo, o far credere loro di essere i migliore, potrebbe far sorgere un dannoso sentimento di superiorità.
  3. reprimere la loro vitalità,
    anche se ogni bambino ha caratteristiche proprie, i maschi sono tendenzialmente più fisici. È sbagliato reprimere questa loro energia. Dovremmo invece trovare il modo di canalizzarla, magari proponendogli di partecipare ad uno sport di squadra.
  4. non parlare loro della pubertà,
    lo sviluppo di un maschietto può essere molto rapido e per alcuni versi traumatizzante. Dovremmo trovare le parole giuste per spiegargli a quali cambiamenti il suo corpo e la emotività andranno incontro.;
  5. non insegnare loro ad essere indipendenti,
    il rapporto tra mamme e figli maschi, in particolare, può essere davvero molto intenso. Tuttavia dovremmo cercare di insegnare ai nostri figli ad avere degli spazi propri, sia in termini fisici che emotivi. Dovremmo permettere loro anche di sbagliare e di affrontare le situazioni con sempre maggiore autonomia.
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